Having a victim-mentality is one of the most damaging attitudes anyone can adopt, as it can either help or hinder progress towards any goal, regardless of its nature.
What does "victim-mentality" mean?
This is the proverbial "point the finger" situation.
Those who have adopted a victim-mentality have a very limited outlook on life, and think that anything that happens is a consequence of factors outside of their control. Reflecting inward is never taken into account. As a victim, absolving oneself of blame is necessary. No one is ever to blame! By playing the "poor me" role, those with a victim mentality tend to revel in the attention, sympathy and validation they receive.
The focus shifts from how powerful we are to how vulnerable we are when we find ourselves trapped in a mindset of victim-hood.
No one is born with a victim mentality, yet no one is immune to taking on the role of a victim. In this defeatist realm can be found sweet elder grandparents, loving and well-intentioned mothers and fathers, teenagers, and even those considered "spiritually awakened".
More than once in their lives, every person alive has played the role of a victim.
Victims want to be mentally prepared for the worst and sadly, for those dwelling in victim-hood, this self-sabotaging behavior becomes more powerful when things seem to be going their way as they are sure "disaster is waiting around the next corner."
How can one break free from the self-defeating, "poor me," pessimistic programming they adopted as a child?
It all starts with how you perceive and view yourself at home. Perceive you yourself as a survivor or a victim?
Embracing life and flowing with it, survivors find strength. They are cognizant that they are solely responsible for what transpires. By taking responsibility for their lives, they know that they are empowered to change them.
On the other hand, victims wallow in self-pity, engaging in arguments and displaying resistance towards life. Believing they are helpless to change circumstances, they dwell in the past as a key to avoiding responsibility. Because their perceptions tell them they are powerless, they live defensively and remain frozen in time without making progress.
The consequences of having a victim mentality are severe. Every area of life - both professional and personal - is negatively affected. Those who persevere in the face of adversity, and refuse to see themselves as a failure, will ultimately overcome challenges as failure only comes to those who give up.
In order to move away from feeling like victims, we must first accept that we are in this state. We cannot alter that which we do not possess. "Change begins with me" - we must shift our attitude to reflect this. No matter how small or insignificant they may seem now, we must embrace survival and take action steps towards some goal we are looking to attain.
We must continually empower ourselves with "I can" and "I will" statements, most importantly, and put a stop to any degrading "I can't" or "I won't" statements and beliefs.
It is essential to take time each day to reflect on the aspects of life that bring us joy and those that are going well. Focusing our mind/energy on positive situations helps to prevent us from adopting a victim mentality.
In the end, we must honor ourselves with the same degree of respect and love that we try to give others. Only then will our minds and actions shift out of victim-hood to survival mode.
We cannot control what others do or every situation that comes our way, but we can choose how we react to them. We can choose not to be victims. We can choose not to be victims.
Are you searching for a powerful ally to assist in silencing the self-defeating thoughts that repeat in your mind? If you're searching for a place to exercise, your local gym is the perfect spot. If you're searching for a place to exercise, your local gym is the perfect spot.
Realizing that small changes in behavior and attitude can lead to great rewards is essential for the victim.